Wednesday, April 25, 2012

"Different but Complimentary"

I cannot shake how similar that phrase is to, "separate but equal" 

I have attempted to write on this subject numerous times, but the truth is I am still too angry and raw. I just want to scream at everyone, "THIS IS NOT EQUALITY! THIS IS NOT LOVE! Quit trying to make your hateful messages sound less hateful!" I have so much frustration, people who barely know me constantly try and reprimand me for holding a different view than them. You are not my husband. You are not my father. You are not my stepfather. What gave you the idea that you have that privilege or right? 

How could life be different if we allowed people to pursue and question truth on their own? What if we stopped trying to control everyone? What if we all actually lived with the faith that God will reveal himself to those very people we seek to control? We all claim God is so much bigger than ourselves, yet I rarely see people acting like it when it comes to relationships. We all try to control and push people to where we want them to be, myself included. 

There is no way for me to write about this subject and keep my anger out of it. So I will direct you to a post written by a man. A man who happens to be the husband of my co-hort over at Mars Hill Refuge. I feel like what he wrote is what has been on my heart for a while now without all the anger and frustration. 


  1. Kaelee, I've been thinking about this post for a few days. I'm sorry for what you've experienced. I'm grieved over this topic more than I can express, yet I still believe there are valuable things to learn about Christ and the gospel through the conservative view of men, women, and marriage. Key for it to be healthy is for the WOMAN to choose it because of her own understanding of Scripture. If it's projected onto her and she conforms because of guilt or pressure, that's not Biblical submission, that's ungodly oppression. My husband and I mutually submit and mutually love, but when there comes a point of disagreement which we cannot reconcile after discussion, I willingly lay down my right to insist on my own way. This is from my own conviction from Scripture, and it has worked in healthy ways in our home.

    Again, I'm sorry that people are projecting onto you something that can only be embraced if it's your own conviction from Scripture.

  2. I have always felt the only reanon men are christians is the female submssion teaching, they love it. Who besides christian men want wemon to be submssive to them? Men who own female sex slaves in bondage. I started hurting myself and nearly committed suicide because of this sadomasochistic misogynistic teaching, it made me fell like christian bible god was my pimp, as this is what pimps tell their sex slaves. Christian men make me sick to my stomach, I have no trust or respect for them. I will tell my little girls to stay away from christian men, they just want a female slave to demean.

    Please Kaelee read The Christian Woman set free by Gene Edwards, and Gods Word to Women by Katharine C. Bushnell. And give them to any woman or little girl you love.

  3. Kaylee, why are the only opinions that would outweigh yours those of men? It's the patriarchy comin' to get you again. Ignore what your father says, ignore the other men in your life - or rather, give them no more weight than the other opinions you consider. If you want to make your own decisions, don't give up at the first hurdle.

  4. I'm so on the same page as you on this. don't go away.